Increasing Productivity by
Strengthening Communication
Sharon M. Danes, Professor,
Department of Family Social Science
Working in a family business is complex
because of the overlap of the business and family. It becomes even
more complex as the business expands and employees from outside the
family are added.
Often productivity becomes an issue. There are some
things you can do to increase productivity that require an investment
of human energy but little to no financial investment. Problem solving
is central to productivity in the family business and effective communication
is core to problem solving.
Expectations About Communication
When
people work together, it is normal for disagreement and/or conflict
to arise. There are several reasons why conflicts can arise:
- Lack
of communication or miscommunication
- Value
conflict (different attitudes, beliefs, or values)
- Gaps
in role expectations (who does what or who decides what)
- Unresolved
prior conflicts
The
first of those reasons, communication, is the focus of this article.
Adjusting the messages you give can improve productivity whether the
people receiving the messages are related to you or not.
One
area that interferes with giving or hearing a message is gender differences
in communication and problem solving. Another is communicating with
respect. Respect is important in motivating others, no matter what
their gender. It is also critical to the decision-making process.
Gender Differences in Communication and
Problem Solving
In a recent study of farm family
business couples, I found that about a quarter of the couples indicated
a great deal of tension around financial decisions. Another one-third
said there was some degree of tension. Husbands indicated more tension
then did wives. However, wives were less satisfied with their decision-making
involvement than were husbands.
When men and women make decisions about money together,
differences often surface. Those differences often arise through the
different ways that they communicate and solve problems. Differences
can surface in regard to who controls the money, who makes the major
financial decisions in the family, and how men and women talk about
money, both alone and together.
Communication Patterns of Women
Women have a connectedness
orientation. They see things as interconnected webs or links. Relationships
are vital to them. They operate under an "ethic of care,"
which emphasizes responsibilities. The foundation of this ethic is
one of nonviolence; what matters most is that no one should get hurt.
Women are socialized to take care of the needs of
others ahead of their own. Thus, it is critical for a woman in financial
decision making to figure out what is important for herself -- not
for her spouse, not for her children, but for herself. Women's perception
of strength includes nurturance and interdependence.
Communication Patterns
of Men
Men, on the other hand, have a task
orientation. They are socialized to take charge, to protect, to get
things accomplished, and to be successful in the eyes of those around
them. They see relationships as hierarchies. Men operate under an
"ethic of justice," which emphasizes the question of rights.
What matters most is equality -- that everyone is treated the same.
It is critical in family financial decision making
that men consider the needs and expectations of others in the family.
What makes them anxious is when they don't know what to do about a
problem. Men equate strength with assertion and aggression.
Gender Differences in Communication
Neither communication pattern is
better than the other. But because of the differences, men and women
may be saying the same thing but not communicating in an effective
manner.
Just being aware of the differences can help you step
back when communication about money is difficult. It gives some information
to assess whether there might be a different way of saying something
in order to be heard by a person of a different gender.
Problem-Solving Patterns
of Women
When problems arise for women, their
initial tendency is to talk about the problem and then act. They need
to express thoughts, feelings, and values as they search for alternatives.
Anxiety arises when they can't do this or they perceive they are not
being heard. Women's problem-solving mode is characterized by methods
that are contextual, narrative, and inclusive.
Problem-Solving Patterns of Men
For men, finding a solution is the
priority. Jumping into action will often be a response to a problem.
Anxiety surfaces for men from not knowing what action to take.
Rather than talk about things, as most women would
do, a man will often go off alone and do something. It is through
action-oriented problem solving that he sorts out his thoughts and
concerns, clarifies his values and priorities, and develops a plan.
Men's problem solving is often based on formal and abstract expression.
When Differences Meet
When these different problem-solving
patterns intersect, often little progress in problem solving occurs.
Women perceive that men are not listening to them and men perceive
women as talking about the problem and not doing anything about it.
Problem solving over money decisions can be more effective
if each gender is aware of how the other communicates and solves problems.
Women need to give men space to figure out what they need to do. Men
need to listen while women process their thoughts, feelings, and values.
Keep in mind that in different situations, different
modes of communication and problem solving are more effective. Part
of treating family members and employees with respect is recognizing
this fact and deciding on roles within the business based on strengths
and need in various situations.
Make Criticism Productive
Most people consider criticism entirely
negative. Criticism should include both positive reinforcement and
a statement of what needs to be improved. However, most people have
only experienced criticism in ways that are blaming and shaming. We
are usually not taught to give criticism in positive ways.
You may have heard that it's important to use "I"
statements in communicating (for example, saying "I feel angry"
instead of "You make me mad."). But an "I" statement
can be just as blaming and shaming as a "you" statement.
A productive "I" statement should:
- use "I" rather than "you"
- include a feeling word
- include a cause of feeling.
Also consider indicating specifically what is needed
to alleviate the problem at hand, and/or end with a question that
targets the discussion toward addressing the concern causing the problem.
Here is an example of "you" and "I" statements
addressing a money issue where one member of a couple does the primary
record keeping:
"YOU" STATEMENT:
You bought that piece of machinery without discussing it with me.
"I" STATEMENT
(with the suggested components): I would feel more secure
about managing the finances if I weren't surprised about a major purchase.
Can we agree on a maximum amount of money that we can spend for the
business without discussing it first?
Keep in mind that "I"
statements, while often helpful, are not appropriate in every circumstance.
They are just one approach to problem solving. But practicing communicating
with respect, if done with sincerity and persistence, will increase
both productivity and enjoyment in doing the work.
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